Thursday, December 3, 2020

“Develop an attitude of gratitude.” - Anonymous

 From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst 

3 December 

Joe was a teacher colleague in the prison where I used to teach, and every day whenever he entered or left the institution he’d give a kind of ‘thank you’ wave when the cop up there in the tower would push a button that would open the gate where he was standing. Occasionally he and I would come in or go out together, and eventually I asked him about it since nobody else, including yours truly, ever waved like that. [The rest of us would complain about being locked up this way – “when’s that damned cop up there going to finish his solitaire game, or his 17th trip to the pizza box, and open this damned gate?” we’d complain cynically.]  

Well, that wasn’t Joe’s attitude; he said the idea came from a verse in the Bible somewhere: "In all things give thanks." He said it was one of those simple verses, and it means, like, ALL things. Thumpingly obvious. He said he found after he got into the habit of waving at that cop that he was seeing other things in his life that were there for him to be grateful for - right under his nose. For example, when his students [all convicted felons, right?] would arrive in the morning he’d often say, “Thanks for stopping by, gentlemen – if you didn’t I wouldn’t have a job!”  

Or his wife’s cooking. He told me that her modest consultancy business gave her a fairly light schedule and that since he had a high-intensity job and a daily 100-mile round-trip commute she used to have dinner on the table by 6:30 every night. It was, he saw, love in action. And he got into the habit of thanking her on a regular basis. He’d bring her flowers maybe once a month from Safeway – he’d sign the accompanying card with something like, "Because it’s Tuesday! Love, Joe," then find that card magnetized on the fridge. And, in a pay-it-forward sort of way, she’d thank him every time he’d do the dishes, or feed the cat, or take out the garbage. He said, "Hey, this is my house too, right?" In short, it looked like this attitude of gratitude was improving his marriage as well as his otherwise stress-filled job. Anyway, the more Joe became grateful that way the more cheerful he became, and – from my perspective anyway - the more fun to be around. So I thought I’d try the same thing – it couldn’t hurt, right? And I found that life got sunnier for me too, although I don’t think I was ever as cheerful as he was. I really envied him!


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