From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
29 June
“Fifty seven million children across the world don’t want an iphone, Xbox or chocolates. They want a book and pen.” – Malala Yousafzai
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
29 June
“Fifty seven million children across the world don’t want an iphone, Xbox or chocolates. They want a book and pen.” – Malala Yousafzai
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
29 June
Be careful that you, as a parent, don’t find emotional blackmail too seductive to pass up. In a moment of passion it’s very easy, fairly early on in your career as a parent, to say to your child, “If you ever __________, you’re out of my life forever!” It doesn’t make any difference what you put in that blank space; that choice yields a yawning disaster stretching out beyond the furthest horizon that is as inevitable as it is profound.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 29
“May the Almighty grant that the cause of truth, justice, and humanity, shall in no wise suffer at my hands.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
28 June
“Buy her a flower when it’s a nothing day. Of course she might surprise you and follow your lead, but even if she doesn’t, buy her the flower anyway. Sincere thoughtfulness is always valuable in its own right because it goes a long, long way toward building a reservoir of goodwill. [And since you’re every bit as screwed up as she is, that reservoir will soon enough be called on.]” – Arnold Kunst
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
27 June
How often does this happen? They get a divorce and go their separate ways as enemies, not as friends. What’s that about? If divorce has to happen, part as friends, blessing one another as two ships that, now, part in the night.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
26 June
The first hint that this may be love is manners. It’s invariably innocent bean-counting, and runs something like this: “I’ll be happy to scratch your back if you’ll be good enough to scratch mine.” Hard on the heels of this phase is the Look-Good-Always phase [I’ll never see her without her face on; she’ll never see me without my stomach tucked in]. Hopefully, with time, the real thing reveals itself because willy-nilly my love and I are bound to step out into the abyss and the one asks for, and the other confers, forgiveness because sooner rather than later the need for forgiveness will arise since each of us is going to screw up. How real the real thing is depends on the extent to which forgiveness - defanging the screw-ups - becomes habitual. That’s a hard standard; many settle for some optical illusion that, in the small print, allows for the opposite: holding grudges. But be warned: holding grudges is sugar in the gas tank.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
25 June
"Comfort zones are for breaking out of." - Arnold Kunst
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
28 June
Since listening is a luxury very few of us ever get from those around us, doing it well, and patiently, and maybe even consistently, is worth its weight in gold. Do it right and you could end up with a friend for life.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
27 June
Every one of us was born utterly deficient in this, or deficient in that. You might even say each of us has been dealt an utterly despairing hand – and now we’re meant, somehow, to play out that hand, morphing it into success. Even so, be assured you’ll get all of what counts on this side of the grave by taking seriously any one of the abiding urges – the innocent, abiding urges – you just can’t escape, and pursuing that urge with the persistence and imagination that success in any human endeavor demands. In other words, you’re to pursue it with relentless single-mindedness – Think Henry Ford putting America on wheels. To change the metaphor, you’re to bloom where you’re planted like a flower blossoming incongruously at 14,000 feet on some sheer alpine rock face.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
26 June
The essence of being a Grandpa: You’re bouncing a grandchild on your knee, and eventually your knee becomes a little moist. So you raise the little bundle of joy into the air and say, "Doesn't this belong to someone?" It’s called “Rent-a-Kid”!
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 27
People underestimated Lincoln at their peril. “He was as wise as a serpent in the trial of a case. I have got too many scars from his blows to certify that he was harmless as a dove.” - Leonard Swett, fellow lawyer and friend
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 26
“Periodically you are called on to progress to a new phase of your life. That often means a new birth to a phase of greater profundity. You may not know where that phase will spring from, or what form it will take, or where it will lead, but like the deep stillness before a great storm, be aware that, if you but consent, primordial strength is gathering for a crescendo of magnificent proportions.” - Arnold Kunst
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
25 June
Life is a treasure hunt. True, life can be harrowing, unjust, full of apparent contradiction and anxiety. Even so, we need to see positives proliferating all about us, and within us. For they are, like the air we breathe, so close to what and where we are that they are very difficult to perceive. They’re also far more potent than all the bad news we’re endlessly surrounded by.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 25
“The slave-breeders and slave-traders are a small, odious and detested class among you [the South]; and yet in politics they dictate the course of all of you, and are as completely your masters as you are the master of your own Negroes.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
24 June
“Before you agree to do anything that might add even the smallest amount of stress to your life, ask yourself: ‘What is my truest intention?’ Give yourself time to let a yes resound within you. When it's right, I guarantee that your entire body will feel it.” - Oprah Winfrey
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
How to Handle a Woman: A Wrong Way
24 June
It’s Super Bowl Sunday and, to paraphrase Sigmund Freud, it’s homosexual bonding time. You’ve got all the guys at your place in front of the TV. Your wife is in the kitchen, and the munchies are running low. Even though you’re A Real Man you’re very, very sensitive to the phrase “what will others think,” so you yell out, “Hey, what are you doing out there? Bring in some more nachos and dip. And don’t forget the beer!” A few minutes later she brings in what you asked for. She doesn’t say a thing to you because all your friends are there and she doesn’t want to make a scene. Even so, she does give you a look that would split atoms if you had bothered to notice. Oh, she’s going to blow, make no mistake about it. And, trust me on this, when she does, you’ll say with supremely validated self-pity, “Where the hell did that come from?” [God help your sense.]
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 24
“Slavery is founded in the selfishness of man's nature -- opposition to it is in his love of justice. These principles are in eternal antagonism; and when brought into collision so fiercely, as slavery’s extension brings them, shocks, and throes, and convulsions must ceaselessly follow. Repeal the Missouri Compromise -- repeal all compromises -- repeal the Declaration of Independence -- repeal all past history, you still cannot repeal human nature. It still will be the abundance of man's heart that slavery's extension is wrong; and out of the abundance of his heart, his mouth will continue to speak.” - Abraham Lincoln
23 June
“It is but a slippery happiness which fortune can give and a frown can take, and not worth the owning which a night’s fire can melt or a rough sea can drown.” - Anonymous
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
23 June
I remember, vividly remember, an incident with my best friend Jerry when we were both aged four or so. One day while we were playing with our toy cars in his sand-box he stole my very favorite toy car and then pretended he hadn't. I lay awake for some time that night plotting my revenge: the next day I was going to pretend he was my friend and while we were playing I was going to slip one of his favorite cars into my pocket. I remember how the very prospect of getting even, laying there sleepless in my bed that night, was utterly delicious to revel in.So, the next day I pretended we were friends as usual, and we began playing cars in his sand-box as we had the previous day. I continued playing and, when I got home at the end of the day, remembered the elaborate revenge I had planned, but then forgot to carry out! In the course of playing I found the car he had taken - he hadn't hidden it very well. Even so I initially felt bad that I had failed to get my delicious revenge - it was as if I had somehow let the team down. Then, that second night, it hit me: forgetting revenge and playing with a friend was maybe the better choice.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 23
“I say now, however, as I have all the while said that on the territorial question -- that is, the question of extending slavery under the national auspices -- I am inflexible. I am for no compromise which assists or permits the extension of the institution on soil owned by the nation.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
22 June
“Dig for water long before the well runs dry.” - Anonymous
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
21 June
“Good decisions come from wisdom. Unfortunately, wisdom only comes after lots of bad decisions.” - Will Rogers
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
22 June
The courage implicit in forgiveness divides the vibrant from all the look-alikes.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
21 June
“Make no mistake about it: the definitive always win; the tentative always lose.” – Arnold Kunst
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 22
“Let reverence for the laws be breathed by every American mother to the lisping babe that prattles on her lap -- let it be taught in schools, in seminaries and in colleges; let it be written in Primers, spelling books and in Almanacs; -- let it be preached from the pulpit, proclaimed in legislative halls and enforced in courts of justice. And in short let it become the political religion of the nation; and let the old and the young, the rich and the poor, the grave and the gay, of all sexes and tongues, and colors and conditions, sacrifice unceasingly upon its altars.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 21
“It is an old and a true maxim, that a 'drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
20 June
“I am not an angel and do not pretend to be. That’s not one of my roles. But I am not the devil either. I am a woman and a serious artist, and I would like so to be judged.” – Maria Callas
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual” by Arnold Kunst
20 June
You and I are supposed to work smart every day. Why? Because there are specific things that need doing today; they need to be prioritized so that all the immediate, intermediate and long-term goals are being catered to intelligently, thoroughly. As a result we’re meant to turn “Obstacles” into “opportunities” – we’re to insure the urgent doesn’t crowd out the important.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 20
“If there is anything that a man can do well, I say let him do it. Give him a chance.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst 19 June “Be yourself. No one can say you’re doing it wrong.” – Charles Schultz
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
19 June
Critics don’t produce. They represent the ultimate in Monday-morning quarterbacking - negating everything, risking nothing.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 19
Following Lincoln’s loss in the senate race against Stephen Douglas in 1858 he said, “I am glad I made the late race. It gave me a hearing on the great and durable questions of the age, which I could have had in no other way; and though I now sink out of view, and shall be forgotten, I believe I have made some marks which will tell for the cause of civil liberty long after I am gone.”
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
18 June
“I believe that every person is born with talent.” - Maya Angelou
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
17 June
“Don’t ever underestimate the profound impact you have on the little kids around you.” - Anonymous
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
16 June
“You can be gorgeous at 30, charming at 40 and irresistible for the rest of your life.” – Coco Chanel
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
18 June
Scripture, wherever you look, always comforts, always challenges. Take the following: “What though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil.” The bad news is that there’s a lot of stuff out there to fear. The good news is that the “fear no evil” part is so categorical. The bad news is the death part. The good news is that it’s only the shadow of death and there’s literally nothing in a shadow. The bad news is there’s no view and precious little perspective in a valley. The good news is that none of it makes any difference because He’s the Shepherd and He’s got it ALL covered.
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
17 June
“If you make a big deal out of a little deal, or a little deal out of a big deal, you’ll be pulled up short every time a dog barks.” – Arnold Kunst
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual” by Arnold Kunst
16 June
You can win at poker with a pair of three’s; you can lose at poker with a royal flush. The important thing isn’t the hand you’ve been dealt but how you play it.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 18
“I hold that while man exists it is his duty to improve not only his own condition, but to assist in ameliorating mankind... I am for those means which will give the greatest good to the greatest number.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 17
“I cannot understand why men should be so eager after money. Wealth is simply a superfluity of what we don't need.” - Abraham Lincoln
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 16
“If the Confederacy fails, there should be written on its tombstone: ‘Died of a Theory.’” - Jefferson Davis
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
15 June
“I will not allow my life’s light to be determined by the darkness around me.” - Sojourner Truth
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
15 June
Life is always full, exciting, rich for those who go at it head on.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 15
“I have never had a feeling, politically, that did not spring from the Declaration of Independence ... that all should have an equal chance. This is the sentiment embodied in the Declaration of Independence. I would rather be assassinated on the spot than surrender it.” - Abraham Lincoln
“Be more like a wild eagle than a domestic chicken. The eagle doesn't need to be with a flock of his own kind to feel good about himself, but is content with his own company; he uses his wings to fly, not just propel himself more quickly along the ground as he runs; he rides hot air currents at 1,800 feet that chickens don't even know exist; and he eats what he hunts, not what he's fed.” - Arnold Kunst
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
14 June
“Self-development is a higher duty than self-sacrifice.” - Elizabeth Cady Stanton
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
14 June
Itzhak Perlman, one of a handful of preternaturally gifted violinists in the world today, arrives at San Francisco International; he’s contracted to do the Beethoven violin concerto tomorrow night with Michael Tilson Thomas and the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra at Davies Hall. He flew first-class, of course, he’ll stay in a very nice hotel, and he’ll receive $40,000 for his troubles.
Two things: first, since the concerto only takes about 40 minute
s, someone with a bitter, pinched imagination will calculate that his fee works out to $1,000 per minute. Not true, of course. Factoring in the practice time, which by rights includes his focusing on mastering this instrument instead of doing lots of other things since the age of, say, four, the hourly rate drops down to something like three cents a month.
Second, he doesn’t say to himself as he clears customs, “I’ve got to get to a practice room at Davies Hall right away to go over that bear of a third movement!” Now, don’t get me wrong: that third movement IS a bear. But whatever other concerns he might have, he’s got that third movement down – after all, this is what he’s been doing since he was four, and he is supremely confident that when he gets to that third movement tomorrow night, as with the first and second movements, he’ll transport the entire audience to Beethoven’s own ethereal plane. There’ll be rehearsal time with that orchestra, of course, but with no sense of desperation, of panic. Since everybody will win,
$40,000 is cheap at the price.
On the other hand, I don’t think it’sreally the money that drives Perlman, at least not the principal thing, any more than the ego validation that comes from the applause. More important than all that is the role he plays in the ethereal realm which is where, as they say, he lives and moves and has his being - what you might call the high that comes from being Beethoven’s go-between. For there are three components at work here: composer, performer, audience. And when the performer honors the composer, right down to the last sfortzando, the composer, dead though he may be, is marvelously, wondrously alive yet again. That is, the composer is siphoned through this artist and this orchestra on this night in the presence of this audience. The performer is integral to feeding the soul of every person in that hall with the richness of Beethoven’s very own genius.$40,000 is cheap at the price.
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 14
In early 1860 during what turned out to be a spectacular speaking tour of New England, Lincoln was approached by the Reverend Mr. Gulliver who told him how impressed he was with the talk he had just heard Lincoln deliver. Lincoln was somewhat taken aback by such fulsome praise, so he asked him what he found so remarkable about his speech. Gulliver replied, “The cleanness of your statements, the unanswerable style of your reasoning, and, especially, your illustrations, which were romance and pathos and fun and logic all welded together.”
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
13 June
“Be yourself; it’s a tough act to follow.” – Katherine Hepburn
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
13 June
Life is a treasure hunt with things of beauty, exhilaration, abundance uniformly hidden in earth-tones, buried in the everlasting ordinariness of things.”
From “Lincoln 365,” by Arnold Kunst
June 13
At one point during the Civil War there was talk of a Southern woman spy in the White House. The Senate Committee on the Conduct of the War heard about it and held a secret session to look into allegations that Mrs. Lincoln, who was from the border state of Kentucky, was a disloyalist. One member of the committee told of what happened. “We had just been called to order by the Chairman, when the officer stationed at the committee room door came in with a half-frightened expression on his face. Before he had opportunity to make explanation, we understood the reason for his excitement, and were ourselves almost overwhelmed with astonishment. For at the foot of the Committee table, standing solitary, his hat in his hand, his form towering, Abraham Lincoln stood. Had he come by some incantation, thus of a sudden appearing before us unannounced, we could not have been more astounded. There was an almost inhuman sadness in his eyes; an indescribable sense of his complete isolation which the committee members felt had to do with fundamental senses of the apparition. No one spoke, for no one knew what to say. The President had not been asked to come before the Committee, nor was it suspected that he had information that we were to investigate reports, which, if true, fastened treason upon his family in the White House.
At last the caller spoke slowly, with control, though with a depth of sorrow in the tone of voice: ‘I, Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States, appear of my own volition before this Committee of the Senate to say that I, of my own knowledge, know that it is untrue that any of my family hold treasonable communication with the enemy.’
Having attested this, he went away as silent and solitary as he had come. We sat for some moments speechless. Then by tacit agreement, no word being spoken, the Committee dropped all consideration of the rumors that the wife of the President was betraying the Union. We were so greatly affected that the Committee adjourned for the day.”
From “Me Too, 365,” by Arnold Kunst
12 June
“There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.” - Homer
From “The Human Condition: A User’s Manual,” by Arnold Kunst
12 June
There are people I'm going to meet today, some of whom I have known before, and they are going to become my life-long friends. Today will begin with each of them - and continue with others met yesterday - a deep, wide-ranging and mutually fulfilling friendship we will cherish all the days of our lives.